For many “old-school” teachers and parents who grew up in an age of greater conformity and fear-based authority, the culture of our schools is in dire straits because they believe there is not enough discipline. Not enough respect. Too few consequences for students who don’t toe the line. The kids are out of control.
Because of this, we need to set clear boundaries for students in our classrooms and strengthen techniques for engaging them in learning. At the school level, building administrators must introduce policies and programs that emphasize personal growth and responsibility.
Be Friendly, But Not a Friend
You are not your students’ friend. Friends help each other out with favors and expect give-and-take. This is not the way things work in the classroom. Do not “friend” students on Facebook or other social-media sites, and do not show favoritism to any single student. Because students are perceptive as to how you react to each and every child in the classroom, they are much less likely to talk back or cause other disruptions if it’s clear you are not providing favors or loopholes for any of them. We teachers have all been in situations where some students ask for special treatment, like extra bathroom breaks or letting it slide if they are tardy. You think other students don’t notice this? Not a chance! Contrary to the belief of many teachers, most students want an authoritative, caring adult in the classroom, one who has a consistent approach to dealing with all students.
That said, it’s important to build constructive relationships with students. Show interest in their music, hobbies, and after-school activities. Students will respond. It can be tough to show patience and flash a smile with certain students—a devious fourth-period student of mine comes to mind—but showing you are a friendly, caring adult will go a long way toward preventing behavioral problems. Many students don’t have an adult in their lives who asks questions and acknowledges likes and dislikes, generally showing interest in their thoughts and feelings. As soon as students realize you care about them as people, many of them will instinctively come to your side and not want to disappoint you behaviorally or academically.
Engagement as Prevention
It’s the teacher’s job to make sure students are engaged. Creating opportunities for movement and involvement like this is often a good way to curb emerging behavioral problems.
Developing Empathy
Thinking more big-picture, an emphasis on social-emotional learning, including approaches like restorative justice, at the heart of the restorative justice process, according to a New York Timesarticle, is relationship building and problem solving: “It encourages young people to come up with meaningful reparations for their wrongdoing while challenging them to develop empathy for one another through ‘talking circles’ led by facilitators.”
If students improve their social-emotional skills, the small conflicts all kids bring into the classroom can remain just that—small issues, rather than full-blown yelling matches. This is even more important now that spats begun on social-media outlets are streaming into our classrooms. Perhaps these issues could be contained more effectively with a restorative justice-like approach. But sound classroom and school-wide approaches to behavior can go a long way in shaping environments where students feel safe and are engaged and learning at high levels.
By: Cristina A. Mariano | Bacong Elementary School | Limay, Bataan
